Confessions of a brit abroad

Until about 9 years ago we had an M&S in Amsterdam. It was a huge shop in the centre, and although the Dutch people tend to be parsimonious it did enjoy something of a good trade (probably mostly British expats and tourists).

The global brand, however, was going through a financial crisis, and the decision at HQ was taken to close down overseas branches and focus on the market at home, re-establishing itself as the nation’s favourite premium retailer, which has happened quite successfully.

It leaves me wondering now, when will we get our M&S back? I miss the food-hall, and have to resort to weekend trips to England in the car. When others are ilicitly hiding contraband cigarettes bought by the truckload I’m sliding cream cakes under the front seat and stacking chocolate flap-jack minibites in the boot up to the ceiling

Hopefully we’ll see the wonderful green sign back here soon – the reconciliation of the English market has happened, so isn’t it time for international expansion again?

 

For some reason Amsterdam has great Sushi houses. I’ve never really been able to figure out why – we’re nowhere near Japan.

Lately we’ve enjoyed takeout Sushi from Sushi House – they have a great website at http://www.sushihouse.nl/#/home and the food is really delicious and not terribly expensive. Give it a try if you’re in town.

 

Impotent and incompetent

The police in Amsterdam, as with most law enforcement agencies in the western world, claim that they have a low tolerance for violent crimes. There is a plethora of material marketed toward the citizens denouncing perpetrators, and assuring victims that such crimes will be met with the full force of the capabilities of a mature and responsible governmental enforcement practice.

The reality is unfortunately not so reassuring.

There are many police stations in Amsterdam, and police have a relatively high profile in the city centre. The vast majority of them, however, seem to be focused on the tourist population – they police the red light district, they police the nightlife hot spots on Saturday night, and they police the train station and airport. The rest of the city, however, sees much less activity.

Visiting a police station to report a crime is usually a relatively positive experience in the Netherlands – there are lots of police officers available (probably explaining why they aren’t out on the streets policing the neighbourhoods) and the process for taking the statement is long and exhaustive, leading the victim to believe that the situation is being taken very seriously. The police generally speak fluent English and translate the victim statement directly into Dutch for entry into their computer system. My experience up to that point was certainly positive – the officer I spoke to was excellent, and gave great reassurance that I’d done the right thing and that he could and would sort the situation out – ‘The police in Amsterdam have no tolerance for violent crimes’.

Unfortunately the positive experience ended with their (now hollow sounding) reassurance.

My particular statement related to two Morroccans who came to my door and threatened my parents, so as it turns out I wasn’t even the victim – my parents were. We all went together to the police station and gave a report (me as a witness). Shortly after the event happened the neighbours (who of course knew that I’d reported them to police) also called the police with a fabricated story about me (they claimed I walked past their window and made a threatening gesture), which the police took seriously and made a visit to see me. Consequently the police then had two connected cases to handle, one real and one fictitious.

Over the next few weeks I was called to give further statements both as a witness and as a perpetrator, over which time the police took no action against the aggressors in the violent crime I reported. During that time I was gradually becoming more and more frightened that they would come back, and so (at my own expense) installed cameras in my building. Repeated requests to the police to take some action fell on deaf ears – they simply didn’t want to get involved and were handing the situation as an administrative process to follow.

Towards the end of the second month I spoke to the chief of the investigation bureau – Mr Salear. He told me quite candidly that he didn’t think anything would happen as he didn’t have the manpower – he only had 10 officers to cover all violent crime in Amsterdam, and as they received an average of 8 new cases per day there was simply no way they could effectively do anything with them, and would only presecute the most serious cases, and even then when there was clear evidence and an identified defendant.

Since it was apparent that I would get nowhere I gave up hope and increased my own security.

A month later I received two letters from the Justice Department – one confirming that they would not prosecute the other party as they had no direct evidence against the neighbours and they didn’t admit to doing anything wrong, and one letter confirming that they wouldn’t prosecute me.

Six weeks after receiving the letters from the Justice Department I received a fine for €400 for threatening behavior!!! I have, of course, written to them, but god only knows when or whether they will respond, and in the meantime will the police turn up at my door for non-payment of a fine that shouldn’t have been issued… it’s a total shambles.

The assurances of the Amsterdam police that they take violent crime seriously is a joke – they barely recognize it at all, and seem to prosecute false claims more vociferously than real ones because they are easier on their administration.

 

Moving to the Netherlands 8 years ago I was surprised and pleased by the state of the public transport system. The trains, trams and buses were (in general) on time, efficient, fast, quiet, cheap and clean. This was in stark contrast to the UK where public transport is excruciatingly slow, filthy, expensive and rarely on time, and so I enjoyed the relatively excellent ability to move around this complex city without the need for my own transport.

Over this period, however, I’ve noticed a significant decline in public transport services.

Trams and buses are rarely on time any more – I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve missed a change between two components of a transport route because the first leg was late. Conversely; they never wait at the stop if they are a few minutes early, meaning that my best attempts at scheduling efficiency usually meet with little success. I frequently get to the stop at the right time to find that the driver has already been and gone, leaving me with a long time to wait until the next scheduled arrival.

The speed of the transport varies widely – sometimes trams whizz along throwing passengers left and right on corners, and at other times buses and trams crawl at a snail’s pace – feeling at times as though I could walk faster. This compounds (or perhaps generates) the issue of late arrival, and serves to frustrate me as an occupant.

Where transport used to be quiet and clean I see it gradually becoming dirtier, and in the case of the bus system the age of the vehicles is developing more and more noise.

The cost is my primary concern at the moment – the OV Chipcard system is a public disgrace in the Netherlands. Fundamentally it’s a great idea – you get a single card which can be charged with funds from your bank account to be used on any form of public transport. Every bus and tram has an RF reader which debits your card and displays the balance, and train stations have a similar scanner to do the same thing when you board or leave a train. The execution of the idea, however, has left a lot to be desired;

• It’s necessary to check-out at the end of every journey, as the system works by charging you €4 when you get on and calculating the delta against the deducted amount when you step off. If you don’t check out you end up paying the full €4. As many people crowd off the vehicle it’s really easy to either forget to check out or to miss the scan point with so many hands going for it
• Scan machines are frequently faulty, meaning you can’t check in or check out when you need to
• The cards break – Patrick’s broke with a monthly subscription attached, which couldn’t be easily transferred
• Issues can only be handled at a GVB office, which have queues taking hours to get through. Internet and phone handling is not possible most of the time, as they need to physically scan the card
• The automatic upload function doesn’t buffer at the bank – if it fails just once a block is put on the card which requires a visit to the GVB office to resolve (see above – they can block it remotely, but only unblock it at the office!)
• The ATM-style upload points are frequently not working – my local machine (in the Albert Heijn) is offline at least 50% of the time

The introduction of the OV Chipcard saw the expiry of the strippencard which had served the Netherlands so well for so many years, and doesn’t even come close to filling those large shoes. Everyone I speak to, including GVB and NS staff, agree that the OV Chipcard is atrocious and a terrible system – the company which runs the administration doesn’t seem to know what it’s doing, and can’t cope with the function.

Overall; I want strippencards back!

 

I have generally found Doctors and other medical practitioners to have distinct superiority complexes.  Not that they don’t deserve them – they’ve spent many years in study with the intention of being in a better position to cure individuals and help the world in general to be a healthier place.  As a person intent upon holding back death, disease and illness, medical practitioners of all types do have a right to feel superior.  When that starts to impact their ability to render effective medical care it starts to become unproductive, and a well established professional control of morals I feel is the only way to assure a limit to this impact.

Historically there was always a large overlap between morals and medicine.  In most cultures it was the calling of the religious to also care for the sick.  Consequently priests and nuns were, in many places, the first doctors and nurses.  In fact in Amsterdam one of the largest hospitals (the OLVG) was originally a home for nuns which was opened to the sick and needy.  As time has progressed most (although certainly not all) cultures have seen the religious and medical fields diverge, and in any modern society the scientific method has superseded the religious beliefs that lead to curing the sick.

There are, unfortunately, a few instances where this isn’t the case – the Pope frequently gives advice on contraception use, witch doctors around the world still find many willing patients, and doctors in the middle east will not treat unmarried women for any form of sexually transmitted disease.  Although these are extreme cases, they are instances of the overlap between morals and medicine (in my humble opinion) being incorrectly applied.

Medical practitioners are human, clearly.  I wouldn’t take advice other than google search results from a machine.  That humanity is important as it provides a vital insight into the human experience, however that does mean that the morals of the practitioner create a lens through which they see the patient and their condition.  The acceptable and appropriate lens effect is culturally determined – I’m sure that the majority of people living in Afghanistan would agree that unmarried women shouldn’t be treated for sexually transmitted diseases. Here in the Netherlands medical practitioners do have a moral lensing effect, which I’m finding isn’t quite where I would expect it.  Dutch people claim that they value honesty, but when a doctor imposes moral judgements on a situation I feel it will limit the honesty with which the patient discloses information, thereby limiting the medical effectiveness of the doctor.  In medical situations, requesting honesty comes at the price of holding back the desire to render moral judgements.

A medical practitioner, therefore, needs to make a choice;  do you want honesty to be able to give an accurate medical assessment and advice, or do you want your morals satisfying?  In my case I’d rather a doctor hold the moral judgements and allow me to be totally honest, providing me with the best medical advice, irrespective of how their (or my) morals describe the situation.  If I want moral guidance I’ll find a priest or other other suitable guide.

It’s worth remembering that an illness doesn’t have morals – it will affect anyone and in any circumstance.  The only way to beat it is to have the same cold, clinical detachment to the facts and treat the situation medically, not morally.

 

Long into my distant past (OK, not quite so ‘distant’, but certainly very much ‘past’) I enjoyed an occasional dalliance with recreational chemicals.  One of the wonderful consequences and benefits of youth is that we are not only allowed to make decisions which others consider stupid and/or unwise, but also that we can recover from the results of those decisions with relative impunity.

Recreational drugs are one of these such areas, and whilst I listened carefully to warnings from teachers, parents and the media about good behaviour, I was firmly of the opinion that my own judgment call at the time was the only/best way to go.  Since I was a relatively sensible kid (most of the time) I stayed well away from what I considered to be ‘hard’ drugs, but did enjoy the ‘soft’ chemicals, one of which was ecstasy.

My early encounters happened in Manchester, during it’s hey-day as a party town in the 90′s.  The clubs were amazing and as these were the early days of club drugs in the UK the ecstasy was high quality, and consequently didn’t have many of the side effects that apparently are evident these days.

There was still quite a lot of scare-mongering, and I remember vividly the Leah Betts death hitting the news –  the tabloids all proclaimed that she had died of ecstasy use, but reading further she’d also been drinking heavily and, although tragic, couldn’t really be attributed to ecstasy.  It also struck me at the time that what wasn’t being reported was that literally hundreds of thousands of people were dying each year from alcohol and tobacco use –  this, when placed alongside ecstasy deaths which numbered in single or double figures, made me think that my choice of not smoking or drinking alcohol was probably the right way to go.

Over the years there have been dozens, hundreds, probably thousands of stories about the evils of drugs, and of course most of the outspoken self-righteous remonstrators type their words with a cigarette dangling in an ashtray or a glass of wine next to their keyboard.  Many studies have indicated that even if the pills don’t kill thousands at club events, they are causing long term and lasting brain damage.

It is nice, therefore, to see stories such as this one in the guardian, where the medical evidence is repudiated; http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2011/feb/19/ecstasy-harm-brain-new-study

Although I can’t say I’m rushing out to try ecstasy again –  I’m so far away from the life I had then it’s almost like I’m a different person –  it is nice to know that I didn’t fry my brains… I guess the mistakes I make now can only be attributed to my own stupidity, and not to any chemical interference!

 

Yet again I’m able to declare “I’m the luckiest man alive” – my wonderful husband threw me a lovely party on Friday for my birthday.  He teamed up with Ilona and Ilse and arranged a party at the local dance school where I take lessons.  Along with arranging the entertainment, food, drinks, cake and guests he also put together two lovely digital presentations;

A set of scanned pictures of me growing up – some of them are slightly embarrassing, mostly due to clothing and/or hairstyle choices I made when I was younger, but they are a really lovely collection of images that brought a lump to a few throats.  The set is uploaded at facebook and you can see them here; Facebook album

The other was a set of birthday greetings from people who couldn’t attend as they live in other countries, which Patrick put together into a montage;

 

Having spent 8 years living in Amsterdam, one of the recurring and perpetual threads I’ve observed in the Netherlands is apathy, and it’s what frustrates me the most about the overall civilization in this country.  There is simply no follow-through of concept – they really don’t care enough to take action.

It’s not uncommon here when throwing a party to expect many, if not most, guests to simply not show up.  Even when they have responded with a positive rsvp they still come up with various excuses (based on last minute calls you’d think this country were in the grip of a startling epidemic – I’ve never hears so many medical issues suddenly cropping up), when in actual fact they simply can’t be bothered.

My birthday on Friday was a perfect example – Patrick, Ilona and Ilse (amongst many others) went to a huge amount of trouble to throw me a superb party;  they booked a venue, arranged a free bar, food, cake, decorations, etc etc etc, and of course that had a cost in terms of both time and money.  Patrick invited around 40 people, 30 of which responded that they would attend, and so the event was sized appropriately

On the night we stood patiently waiting at 8pm, and nobody showed.  An hour later the first 2 guests arrived, followed by a slow trickle.  Throughout the evening only 19 showed up (including us!).

That being said, I had a truly lovely time.  The guests who did show up were the ones I wanted to see, and those who didn’t… well, I guess I know how much they value my friendship now, and they certainly won’t be invited again.

The gay scene in Amsterdam is another example of the city-wide apathy that the Amsterdammers seem to have in abundance. Everyone in Amsterdam complains that the gay scene is dying – bars are closing at an incredible rate, and “the scene isn’t what is used to be”, however as with any economic system; the bars in Amsterdam will only support the value that the customers place on it – if nobody goes and purchases drinks of course they will close down and others will not open in their place – it’s simply not financially worth it if the queens are so apathetic to the environment that they don’t put their money where their mouth is.

Similarly the problems we encounter with customer service – if people in Amsterdam really did care about bad service they would vote with their Euros and move their business elsewhere, however what I see in reality is that the Dutch love to complain, but don’t have any intention of putting their complaint into action in the form of taking business away from poor performing service providers.  Splash is a perfect example of this.  As you see in my previous post I had a problem, and so I left.  I even created a website dedicated to people boycotting with details of other gyms, and expected at least some response.  So far; nothing.  Not a single person has posted on the site.

Eleanor Roosevelt said “So much attention is paid to the aggressive sins, such as violence and cruelty and greed with all their tragic effects, that too little attention is paid to the passive sins, such as apathy and laziness, which in the long run can have a more devastating effect.”, and she was right – the Dutch have focused so much attention on quelling what they considered to the be unacceptable components of society that they forgot to maintain the positive energy that would ensure they can continue to progress.

 

Strangely, I quite like Margaret Thatcher.  I think she stood up for policies because she thought they were what was best for the country at the time.  I don’t say I necessarily agree with the policies themselves, but I do agree with her strong approach to supporting what she believed in.  Unlike today’s politicians she didn’t change her mind as soon as public opinion wavered.

This looks like a great movie, although the comments from the Tory camp make me think that they’ve mucked about with history, which is a bit annoying – the facts were strong enough in themselves.